When I Get Old…er

Sometimes, I get to thinking about when I get older, where will I be? Who will I know? Will my kids still be close? Will I start going crazy? Am I already headed down the path to crazy? Will my husband and I still be motorcycle riding, adventure taking old people? Will we own a house? Cars? Land? Grandkids? Will we go up in rapture before any of that will actually happen?

There are a lot of things to consider. We rent a house. We pay 2 car loans. Own 2 dirtbikes for actually racing purposes. 3 working bicycles for exercise purposes. We do not have a gym membership. We do not pay any kind of community fees from living in a subdivision. God forbid that we ever have to do that. The country is where we want to be. We will never own a mini van, no matter if we have more kids or not. I love my Cadillac! I make up excuses to leave my house so I can drive it.

I still have both of my parents. This will be the only time in my life that I can say that I am about to be a big sister. Half sister. My dad’s girlfriend is having his baby. Weird? Yes. Completely. It’s an *oh well, let’s move on* situation. I buy my kid’s clothes from Children’s Place and Baby Gap. I’m a little obsessed, but with this whole trying to save for a year to pay off a vehicle, I have to cut back that shopping a bit. My kids love being outside and would live outside if I would let them.

My daughter is cute and she knows it. My son is my bud and laughs every time I just look at him. I call my daughter monster. My son is called Bubby and mostly answers to Bubby. The monster girl does not like being cold. Bubby is hot most of the time. Anyway, you get the drift. Life is pretty great right now. We are waiting to see where the job is going to take us within the next few months. Somewhere South, just not sure where.

All of this moving around doesn’t leave much room for stability. The kids aren’t old enough to be in school yet, so it doesn’t hurt to move right now, but when they start school, things may change. Not sure how though. When I think about our future and where we will be, I honestly can’t see us anywhere yet. I haven’t found that one place that I love to be, and we just have to live there. We have met some great people in our travels, and we have met some not so great people. We have met people that were great in that moment, but very easy to forget in the long run and we have met people that will be our friends forever.

Our goal for our life is to eventually find land, build a house on a small part of that land and then the rest…motocross track! My husband will be riding his dirtbike forever into eternity. At our mansion in Heaven, God had better allow for a track to built for him or he may consider moving 😉 His dad still races and he is turning 61 this year. My husband is covered as far as what he wants to do when I grows old, but me? I think I may know what I want to do, but it’s just a matter of where we when that time comes.

I love being creative. I love home decorating and making things pretty. I love cooking and have people enjoy that cooking. I love making people feel comfortable and happy. Someday, I would like to open up my own B&B. Sounds reasonable? I think so. I just have to plan and plan…and oh yeah…make a plan. Pray and believe. I have ambition, but I need to learn the ropes. I never went to college. I got married early in life and still don’t regret it to this day.

I strive to be the parent that my kids can look up to and say to their friends *I want to be like my mom and dad when I grow up* I want to set the bar. I don’t want to be just another statistic. I want to grow up with dignity and be a woman of honor and help my husband be the man he is supposed to be. I am very blessed to be where I am at right now and try not to take anything for granted. I love my husband. I love kids. I love my family. I want to live the standard of Godly parents.

I will mess up. I will fail. I will occasionally yell and then cry because I was too hard. My kids will get mad at me. They will say things to me that will hurt my feelings, but in the end I know that they don’t really mean what they said. I will take things personal. But if none of those things happen, I will never learn. Growing up is hard and life isn’t fair. Just take what you have and cherish it and make the best of what God gives you.

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My Princess Child

So I realize that every time that I post about my daughter, I refer to her as the Monster Girl. It’s just her nickname. It doesn’t mean that she is crazy or defiant. She just has THAT personality. When she plays, sometimes she likes to growl like a lion or a monster 🙂 She’s rough. My husband said last night that we should send her pictures into contests or agencies for modeling. She’s soooo cute. That could be us being biased, but you can be the judge of that. 

Daddy had just shown her how to put her hands in her pockets. She thought that was the coolest thing ever. Anyway…When I think about putting either of my children into anything like modeling, my mind goes back to Toddlers and Tiaras. Those mothers are CRAZY!  Maybe it’s on tv cause they are the extreme part of that field. I don’t know, but I don’t ever want to feel like I am exploiting my child to anything that she really doesn’t want to do or be apart of. She is only 2 and still doesn’t communicate the greatest. What do I do here? I want to give her every opportunity that I can to help her succeed, but I don’t want to push her so hard that she resents me later in life. I guess it would be me who would need self-control.

She’s a doll, but she’s my doll. 🙂 If I do decide to go through with *child modeling*  I will probably wait until we move. Too much goes into a move, especially with the move we are about to make. State to state is a lot more difficult than town to town. Anyway…Florida or Texas. I’m sure that either place will offer some great opportunities, plus great weather!

Making an Effort

I realize that writing is no longer my strong suit. I used to write very well as a teenager, journal entries, poems, whatnot like that, but as of late, it’s been difficult coming up with words that are inspiring, breathtaking, wonderful, anything like that. It’s quite disappointing, especially if you are the reader looking for something interesting to read about someone’s life and their day to day encounters. I’m going to be quite honest. Nothing spectacular ever really happens in this household. I’m not saying that we don’t have fun here or nothing EVER happens, just nothing significant. I’m more or less blogging for me cause it helps me relax and unwind and get a different perspective on life.

*pause for diaper change*

Anyway…I’ve been trying to get myself to start getting up early and get ready before the babies wake up. It hasn’t quite happened yet. I am not an early riser. I like…no LOVE my sleep. You ask, *why have kids if you love sleep?* I love my kids more. 🙂 There isn’t anything greater for me to do than to just be a mommy. When I get up with the kids, I am not in the mood to cook, so what do I do? Heat up pancakes or toast waffles or put cereal in a bowl. My daughter is 2, she doesn’t care what I feed her as long as she gets to eat. Well, I am not setting a good example for her, that’s for sure. Quick is easy so that’s what we will stick with. Even she doesn’t get it yet, I do and that enough should matter. So what did I do this morning after my shower? I cooked us eggs and toast. Yah for effort for me! 🙂 Did the Monster Girl eat them? Of course….not….She used to love eggs. She would clean her plate. Now, I can’t hardly get her to eat anything that is really good for her except apples. That girl loves her some apples. She half a piece of toast and now is playing…making a mess…it’s all the same.

Another thing that I want…need to start doing is playing more and turning the tv off. Most of the time, she could care less about watching it, I just like it for the noise. I don’t like a quiet house. Kinda creeps me out. M.G. likes to learn and she is so smart. She remembers just about everything. Her attention span is just about 3 minutes. Is that normal for a 2 year old? We try to get her to focus, but sometimes she is just so dead set on doing something else, she gets herself all worked up over nothing.

We do have errands to run today, and my sitter has too much to catch up from missing last week so I’m alone today. So it’s just a normal day around here for me. Nothing spectacular or significant going on. I do need to work on The Boy’s birthday party stuff. I’m probably going to bake a test cake this Friday. I need to make sure that I really can do it. Have a nice day blog world.

Walmart+kids=not a good time

I have more to blog about later, but I wanted to get this out there while it was still fresh in my mind. I have been having skin problems for a few days now and finally got the Dr. to call a script in for me to help. I wanted it called into Walmart yesterday cause I was there, but they waited too long and I had to go get it today. Shopping with 1 child is a piece of cake compared to shopping with multiples. My babies are 15 months apart, the oldest being 2 and the youngest about to turn 1. The boy is much more chilled out than the monster girl, but she is usually pretty good when we go places (as long as we aren’t standing still) Anyway…The pharmacist got my script, and then I proceeded to ask if they had my insurance one file. Of course they don’t. More waiting is involved here. I stood at the counter with a very impatient little girl. She cried then she stopped…cried stopped…and so one for like 10 minutes and then everything was done. I got my medicine, and we could leave.

I tried to grab Kylee’s hand and she just took off. She didn’t go very far when all of sudden she just burst into a high pitched scream and tears were rolling down her face and judgmental stares were on her and then me. She wasn’t upset b/c she didn’t get something she wanted, she was just tired and wanted to move. I pick her up, console her while these little old ladies just stare at us like we were to start WW3. These are the moments when I just wanna look them in the face and say *what are you looking at?*

I was more concerned with getting out of Walmart and getting in the car and going home. She was a little angel as soon as we get to the car. Everything was fine. I don’t understand why people have to be…no…have to look at you like you don’t know what the heck you are doing. Has it really been THAT long since you have had to take your kids out in public and appease them and try to get things done at the same time? Or were you just that perfect parent who had the perfect kids that never screamed or cried or basically just drive you nuts? I would rather be in a room with a few screaming kids than anyone that will look at me like that again. Those people make me feel like a horrible parent. I know I’m not. I’m still in learning mode and so is my child…so deal with it. Thanks!