The Better Me Project

There are days that I feel very lazy and don’t want to do a thing, and then there are days that I feel very productive and get so much done that I don’t know how I did it all in one day. Unfortunately, the lazy days come too often and the productive days…well, you get where I am going with that. I want to be a better person. A better mother. A better wife. A better, well…everything. It’s hard to get things done with 2 kids running around the house taking everything out that you just cleaned up or making messes where you just vacuumed. It gets frustrating and almost makes me not want to try to some point because it’s just going to get messy again. I strive to have the house cleaned, laundry done and dinner finished by the time hubby comes home from work, but it doesn’t always work out that way. He’s a good sport about it just as long as I pay attention to the kids and make sure that they are learning something new everyday or getting outside to play. I am not a perfect mother and neglect that sometimes, but that is because my brain is sometimes in cleaning mode, and I feel that I need to get everything done. The reality of it all though, I CAN stop what I am doing because it won’t go anywhere, and I can get it done later. That mode is hard for me to turn off sometimes.

Today, I was sitting on the couch with my daughter (who is almost 3), and I was loving on her. I told her that I was going to eat her toes. She started laughing and said “no mommy, my toes not food. That food.” I kept persisting just to make her laugh, and kept saying that her toes weren’t food. Too cute, right? Kids say the funniest things. After that, I started doing laundry, but I wanted her help and she wanted to play with her puzzles. She wanted me to play so I made a deal. She helped me with laundry, and I would play with puzzles. She was very happy to help as long as mommy played with her. I don’t want to miss anymore moments like that ever. I know that with life, it will happen, but I am going to try my hardest to be the best mommy that I can be for my babies.

If you would have known me a few years back, you would ask me what changed me because I am definitely not the same person I was even just a couple years ago. I didn’t cook. I hardly cleaned. I didn’t craft. I wasn’t creative whatsoever. Let’s just say, I was not motivated to really be anything special. I was just plain boring. Well, lately, that just hasn’t settled with me. I got on Food Network and started looking up recipes and things that looked yummy. I got addicted to Pinterest (like everyone else). I used my sewing machine so much that it crapped out on me last week. I love to crochet at night before I go to bed. I sell on etsy. I clean just about everyday. I look for things to make my household more organized…etc…In fact, the next project that I am going to start very soon is building my own furniture. I can’t ever seem to find furniture that I really like, just stuff that I could live with and then eventually sell or throw out. I want pieces that I can be proud of keep forever. The Handbuilt Home by Ana WhiteΒ is where I got the idea that I can do things like that from. She has easy to understand instructions and an appeal to her designs. If my first build comes out as awesome as I think that it will, I think that I am going to get her book. :)I want to learn now what I can teach my kids later in life. I want them to learn how to be respectful and polite. Calling elders ma’am and sir or just anyone. I want them to know how to manage money and be creative. I want them to want to learn. To have a passion for something. To love and to live. To be like their daddy and to WANT to be like him.

Their daddy is a wonderful man and a loving husband. I am better at being a mother, I can be better at being a wife. If I can be a better wife, I can be a better me. I don’t want to lose ME in all the other titles that I have. I want to be somebody and touch someone with my story. My past. My present and my future. I do not boast in the things that I have done lately because without my God, I couldn’t have, wouldn’t have started or done anything that I have. He is the One who has given me the creativity and the want to be better and make things beautiful. He has given me the mind to start these things. Because trust me, I am not who I was years ago. I am better already and the journey to a better life has just started.

I hope to inspire so stick with me πŸ™‚

Redirection…

It has been quite some time since I have been on here. At first it was hard not blogging, but the longer I waited to do it, the easier it got to slip my mind. I put it on hold when a new direction of life presented itself to us, and we had to move cross country…like literally. 1800 miles away from home. The hubby’s job moved us to sunny California! I love it here πŸ™‚ Couldn’t ask for a better experience so far. Anyway…Since we have been here, I have been quite busy trying to figure out my place in life now. The kids are getting older and easier to deal with. Ky is in preschool and loving every minute of it. It also gives me a few hours of alone time C. He misses his sissy though when she is gone. Before we initially moved, I started sewing and making crafts just for fun. Now? I am trying to make a business out of it. I am starting out by making wallets to sell and have a couple patterns for purses but haven’t gotten that far yet. I made a duvet for the guest room and just finished Ky’s bedspread for the bed she will be getting here soon. I will post pictures after the bed is all put together. I have an etsy shop.

http://www.etsy.com/shop/mamamaryeldesigns

I started selling Scentsy again and hope to do well with it here. I have a couple of parties lined up, but nothing set in stone yet.

http://marylake.scentsy.us

My house is constantly a mess with kid’s toys and my sewing projects everywhere. I have been cooking more. In fact, my house smells awesome right now because of the Crockpot Pork chops that are cooking right now. Making me hungry πŸ™‚ The hubby wants us to start playing music and singing again. We got the songs, just need the time to practice.

So as you can see, a lot of things are starting to develop, but just waiting for the time when it all comes to pass and start being a success at things that we want to do and not what we necessarily have to do. Ky’s birthday is coming up quickly which means that Christmas is also. Lots of things to do. Lots to get ready for. And as I am writing, I am realizing that I don’t have much else to say right now πŸ™‚ Guess it’s time for the Waltons on the Hallmark Channel…I’m such a girl πŸ˜‰

When I Get Old…er

Sometimes, I get to thinking about when I get older, where will I be? Who will I know? Will my kids still be close? Will I start going crazy? Am I already headed down the path to crazy? Will my husband and I still be motorcycle riding, adventure taking old people? Will we own a house? Cars? Land? Grandkids? Will we go up in rapture before any of that will actually happen?

There are a lot of things to consider. We rent a house. We pay 2 car loans. Own 2 dirtbikes for actually racing purposes. 3 working bicycles for exercise purposes. We do not have a gym membership. We do not pay any kind of community fees from living in a subdivision. God forbid that we ever have to do that. The country is where we want to be. We will never own a mini van, no matter if we have more kids or not. I love my Cadillac! I make up excuses to leave my house so I can drive it.

I still have both of my parents. This will be the only time in my life that I can say that I am about to be a big sister. Half sister. My dad’s girlfriend is having his baby. Weird? Yes. Completely. It’s an *oh well, let’s move on* situation. I buy my kid’s clothes from Children’s Place and Baby Gap. I’m a little obsessed, but with this whole trying to save for a year to pay off a vehicle, I have to cut back that shopping a bit. My kids love being outside and would live outside if I would let them.

My daughter is cute and she knows it. My son is my bud and laughs every time I just look at him. I call my daughter monster. My son is called Bubby and mostly answers to Bubby. The monster girl does not like being cold. Bubby is hot most of the time. Anyway, you get the drift. Life is pretty great right now. We are waiting to see where the job is going to take us within the next few months. Somewhere South, just not sure where.

All of this moving around doesn’t leave much room for stability. The kids aren’t old enough to be in school yet, so it doesn’t hurt to move right now, but when they start school, things may change. Not sure how though. When I think about our future and where we will be, I honestly can’t see us anywhere yet. I haven’t found that one place that I love to be, and we just have to live there. We have met some great people in our travels, and we have met some not so great people. We have met people that were great in that moment, but very easy to forget in the long run and we have met people that will be our friends forever.

Our goal for our life is to eventually find land, build a house on a small part of that land and then the rest…motocross track! My husband will be riding his dirtbike forever into eternity. At our mansion in Heaven, God had better allow for a track to built for him or he may consider moving πŸ˜‰ His dad still races and he is turning 61 this year. My husband is covered as far as what he wants to do when I grows old, but me? I think I may know what I want to do, but it’s just a matter of where we when that time comes.

I love being creative. I love home decorating and making things pretty. I love cooking and have people enjoy that cooking. I love making people feel comfortable and happy. Someday, I would like to open up my own B&B. Sounds reasonable? I think so. I just have to plan and plan…and oh yeah…make a plan. Pray and believe. I have ambition, but I need to learn the ropes. I never went to college. I got married early in life and still don’t regret it to this day.

I strive to be the parent that my kids can look up to and say to their friends *I want to be like my mom and dad when I grow up* I want to set the bar. I don’t want to be just another statistic. I want to grow up with dignity and be a woman of honor and help my husband be the man he is supposed to be. I am very blessed to be where I am at right now and try not to take anything for granted. I love my husband. I love kids. I love my family. I want to live the standard of Godly parents.

I will mess up. I will fail. I will occasionally yell and then cry because I was too hard. My kids will get mad at me. They will say things to me that will hurt my feelings, but in the end I know that they don’t really mean what they said. I will take things personal. But if none of those things happen, I will never learn. Growing up is hard and life isn’t fair. Just take what you have and cherish it and make the best of what God gives you.

What is This Year Going to Bring?

It’s the beginning of March and the year already feels like it’s going so fast. My son turns 1 on Wednesday, Spring is right around the corner, my daughter is starting to talk more clearly and moving is in the near future. So what do I want to accomplish in this next year? I would like to figure out how to get at least one of our vehicles paid off plus save money for a down payment for a home. Is it possible? Sure why not? It just means cutting back on spending i.e. eating out, shopping, using coupons, etc…

I’ve been starting to use coupons a couple months ago, but I don’t think that I have quite got the hang of it yet. I hear about so many families saving so much money using them, and I am not quite at that stage yet. I clip. I print. What else is there to do? I’ve thought about buying a book for my kindle to help. Any suggestions?

HAHA! So much for cutting back on unnecessary spending πŸ™‚

Anyway…When you have a goal of paying of $20,000 in 1 year, it gets a little overwhelming, especially when the husband wants to race dirt bikes this year. It doesn’t cost as much as go-kart racing did, but still, it’s spending money that we could save. I want him to have fun, so I just won’t have to worry about it. He deserves his fun. He works all the time and hardly gets any time to himself, so why not?

With trying to save money, there are a lot of things that I have to start doing that I don’t normally do. You know that time of day when it’s almost supper time and you don’t know what you are going to fix? The husband has gotten used to having a meal done or almost done when he comes home from work and time is running out. Yeah, that’s been me lately. Β Not too sure what to fix. I have a pantry full of food and a fridge full also, but still, nothing sounds appealing to fix. Once a week, I am going to start making a weekly menu. That will help on the grocery list and not spending $$ on unnecessary food and also will help me figure out what coupons I can look for.

Next is looking at our bills and what we can cut back on. When I think about it on the top of my head, the only thing that I really want to cut back on is our cable/internet bill, but how do I do that? We don’t watch cable at all. We do pay for netflix and hulu which is $16 total for the month. I have liked having a home phone b/c it has cut back on me calling landlines from my cell phone and having the possibility of me going over our minutes. The internet is a necessity in this day of age, so there won’t be any cutting back on that.

So, as you can see, I’m a bind as to where to cut back. As far as personal goals, I want to start exercising everyday. I found a great cardio/strength workout on pinterest.

  • 30 Jumping Jacks
  • 5 Pushups
  • 25 High Knees
  • 7 Burpees
  • 10 Crunches
  • 7 Squats
  • 5 Pushups
  • 10 Crunches
  • 5 Pushups
  • 7 Squats
  • 30 Jumping Jscks
  • 1 one minute wall sit
  • 5 Pushups
  • 25 High Knees

I am not in horrible shape, but definitely not ready for bathing suit season. I don’t want to lose any weight. I just want to get rid of my baby belly. Toning. That’s my goal. So anyway…got lots of stuff to do today.

This Takes the Cake

I made my first cake last night, and let me tell you, it may not look pretty, but oh my! It tastes amazing! I get a lot of my recipes off of http://www.foodnetwork.com. It took a couple of tries for the frosting. The first try came out too runny. I think I messed up with the egg whites. I don’t think that I whipped them up enough. I’m sure that it would have worked for a more professional baker, but I’m still learning. This is the frosting I ended up using:

Basic Buttercream Icing on the Food Network.

The cake that I made wasΒ Classic White Cake on the Food Network. OMG! This tastes amazing. I was making this as a birthday cake test for my son. There wasn’t a lot of ingredients involved which was great because I had everything that I needed for my little project. Looks good huh?

I was really surprised about how little batter this recipe made, so the actual cake was smaller than I was expecting.

I worked on the frosting as the cakes were being made. Like I said, the first one did not work out, but here it is cooking.

That part was a little difficult for me because I was trying to get my eggs whites to beat and also keep check on the temperature of the syrup. Yeah, that’s something that I have definitely not mastered yet. πŸ™‚

The second frosting that I made did not need cooking. It was just 2 pounds of powdered sugar, 2 tsp. vanilla, half a cup of milk and a cup and a half of butter. It’s very sweet but yet so heavenly. The next time I make a frosting, I have a different recipe that I’m going to try, but I need a double boiler for it.

Well, like I said, the cake didn’t come out too pretty, but it tastes amazing! Very moist and oh so yummy. My next project Β in baking is rolling fondant. I would like to make that for my son’s birthday cake.

If you have any suggestions, I am all ears. I need as much help that I can get. I love to bake, and I want to get better. Enjoy!

Can We Get Back to Normal Please?


I know that it’s almost Wednesday, but I am still going to talk about the weekend a bit. It snowed like crazy here. We got over a foot, and might I add that I am not too thrilled about it. When it snows, it doesn’t just go away unfortunately. Depending on how cold it is, it may stick around for a good while. Meaning, the sides of the roads are dirty and also parking lots. I shouldn’t really complain too much since I don’t get out much anyway being pregnant and having a 1 yr old. It’s quite difficult. I was debating on whether to go to church on Sunday. Saturday night before we went to bed, I decided that we might as well. Of course, Jordan goes because he plays guitar in the worship band, but I can’t do much so my schedule is a bit more flexible. Well, sadly, we ended up sleeping in, and I didn’t have time to get me and Kylee ready for church, so we ended up staying home anyway.

My friend, Amanda, tweeted me a recipe for a crackpot lasagna. Having no time lately to cook really, I decided to try my hand at it. It was a hit! Thank God because when it comes to cooking, I don’t have a wide variety of recipes to go off of. Plus, I really don’t like to cook much anyway. My poor husband. He didn’t marry me for my cooking, that’s for sure! HA! He even said that it was a winner. I will have to agree with Amanda on the Ricotta needs a bit more flavor. She suggested more Parmesan. I also think that next time, I will add beef. The spinach, though, gave it a different flavor.Β 

I’ve never eaten lasagna with spinach. I even got Kylee to eat and that was a miracle. She really likes pasta though, so that made up for the spinach being in there πŸ™‚ After lunch, I don’t what the heck we were thinking, but we decided to go to the mall. It was still snowing out, a lot and also, I haven’t taken Kylee out for quite some time now. Let’s just say, we got what we needed to get and then left. She didn’t want to be in the stroller, miss independent. By the time we were done looking and buying, we took her out of the stroller, she held both of our hands, and we walked through the mall. It was fun for her and she was happy. That’s all the mattered. Daddy doesn’t want to take us anywhere anymore until she can behave properly. He can’t handle her crying, not even in the car. I guess I am just used to it, and I told him that he just has to ignore her because there isn’t anything wrong with and nothing you can about it until we get home. Did I mention that she didn’t want to take a nap that day? She may have slept for maybe 15 minutes in the car. Oh the joys of parenthood.

I go to the Dr. Thursday for my 34 week check-up. I’m quite excited about this one because I’m going to talk to her about setting up a plan for when Conner will be born. Our family lives too far away to just call and them be here when I need them, and Daddy works a lot. I need some sort of plan to go by. Even if I do go into labor, it will be ok, I just don’t want to stress about it anymore. I’ve been starting to have contractions. Not bad ones, but they come and they don’t feel great. There isn’t much more room for Conner in my belly, so I would have to say that he is over staying his welcome πŸ™‚ He needs to come join the world now. It would be nice. I’m ready to start this life. I’ve been pregnant, practically for 2 years now and after this, I’m done. I’m ready to get back into shape. I’m ready to get into a routine. I’m just ready…

Everyone says don’t wish your life away. I’m not doing that. I just want to get back to normal. That’s all! I can’t wait to watch my kids grow up together and be buddies. I love the age that Kylee is at right now because she is so much fun to play with. Grant it, I’m super tired and I can’t always play like she wants me to right now. Once Conner is born, things will be a lot different around this house, and I welcome it. God has blessed us tremendously and I do thank Him everyday for that.